People who really know me… know that I rarely express a personal opinion. They are aware that my intent in communicating, facilitating workshops, public speaking, etc… is to inspire intelligent conversation, to stimulate self-reflection, and to open the lid on outmoded and limited beliefs and perspectives pervasive in our personal lives and culture.
To stir the pot a bit last Friday, I posted a comment on my Facebook profile, which, apparently, went beyond my typical, inspirational ‘nice’ girl image. It was a simple comment that had been passed down to me years ago by a few close male friends, who were self-aware, courageous and compassionate enough to share a moment of honest male introspection with me during a time when I was quite discouraged and disillusioned with relationships.
Here it is:
Women! Do not, I repeat do not, leave your happiness in the hands of a man. As much as I love them, they are dump creatures. Love them, appreciate them, adore them if you must. But under no circumstance should you leave the fate of your happiness in their hands…. a real man, who knows himself very well, will admit this outright! 🙂
I received over 50 comments on this Facebook post from both men and women. My female friends posted wishes of encouragement, which was very sweet, while the males, for the most part, understood what the comment meant.
One male, however, whom I hadn’t seen or spoken with in 10 years, posted this comment,” I’m saddened by your post. How can you categorize all males as Dumb creatures. That I take as an insult as we are not all the same. It’s like me saying that all females are Dumb and Manipulative. Which again is also not true. The bottom line don’t blame the masses for the few bad apples out there. And I still love you even though you think were dumb creatures. I forgive you.”
“I forgive you?”… “I FORGIVE YOU?!!” Since when do women need to be forgiven for expressing their opinions, comments, thoughts and reflections, publicly or privately, and especially on their own social media profile? Last time I checked, women had the legal right in this country to challenge male perspective and opinion. We also have the right to freedom of expression!
I thank you, my dear Paul, for your comment, your willingness to be so candid, and for your courage to express it publicly. You reminded me of the ego’s need for supremacy, and the gratitude I feel for my wonderful, self-aware male friends who are no longer in denial and keep their ego in check. And, as they pointed out to me … “as enlightened and as benevolent our egos would lead us to believe we are, we still have a long, long way to go!” And for that, I too, forgive you!